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Taking Care of Your Emotional Health for Valentine’s Day

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Taking Care of Your Emotional Health for Valentine’s Day


Pink and red colors dominate the sight as chocolates, cards, balloons, flowers and stuffed toys deck out mall aisles and drug stores. It can only mean that Valentine’s Day is around the corner. For some people, however, the holiday can produce more anxiety than bliss and romance. The constant pressure to live up to the idea of proving the amorous feeling for someone in just a single day of gifts and passionate gestures can be too much for some. Buying flowers! Buying a gift! Making a dinner reservation! Spending the day on a getaway in paradise! BEING ROMANTIC!

For this reason, many people, whether in a relationship or not, feel how different, alone or low on a day which is supposed to be a celebration of love and togetherness. Despite the pink and red decorations, Valentine’s Day is a holiday that can be sad for some people. Worse, it is a day when hotlines receive more calls from individuals crying out for help for depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, self-harming behavior, and other emotional health issues. If you are one of them, you can rise above your emotional and behavioral challenges through counseling.


When Valentines Becomes Sad

Valentine’s Day has been embraced as an opportunity to express love. It is not only focused tightly on romantic relationships, but it is also an occasion to celebrate love for family and friends, or even do random acts of kindness to people unknown to you. Sure, there is no need for a special day to express your love, but days like Valentine’s Day comes with lots of portrayals of unrealistic and romanticized ideals to measure up, which can either cause you to feel better or to feel sad.

Feeling sad or feeling down on Valentine’s Day is very typical. Unfortunate, but true. Certainly, Valentine’s Day is a happy occasion for many, but some may feel depressed to be alone during this holiday. As people take the day as an opportunity to spend time with that special someone or, for some, with the people most special to them, it can be inherently embarrassing for others who are alone on hearts’ day. It cannot be helped to feel acutely frustrated seeing others blissfully in love. The day is just the most inauspicious time for some people to feel alone or even unwanted. Others may be reminded of their perceived failure to find a partner.

Valentine’s Day is a time to create more memories, show love or feel loved. Not so if you have just recently broken up with someone, if you lost a beloved and you are grieving, if you are single and longing for a relationship, if you are licking any sort of fresh wounds, then Valentine’s Day can be a gloomy holiday that is tough to navigate. The stimulus of the day that is meant to be about feeling good can, instead, serve as a cruel reminder of togetherness, love and romance. Without someone significant to celebrate the day with, powerful emotions are triggered by memories of your losses or what you are missing.

Strangely enough, broken hearts are a scientific fact. The American Heart Association (AHA) explains that real-life broken hearts can actually lead to cardiac issues. Valentine’s Day can be an extremely stressful event that can potentially have an impact on the heart. More and more studies are able to discover the connection between loneliness and health. One study even concludes that loneliness increases the risk of premature death by 45 percent. For some, Valentine’s Day can indeed be the holiday that causes feelings of depression, anxiety and isolation.

The good news is that broken heart syndrome is highly treatable, as well as the emotional and behavioral health conditions that often grip some people around Valentine’s Day.


Sailing through Valentine’s Day

First of all, there is no pressure to feel happy all the time. Whether you are in a “bad” relationship, single, or grieving, you are more likely to celebrate Valentine’s Day with a host of difficult feelings, ranging from anxiety, depression, sadness, anger, or irritation. Although it is perfectly natural to have unpleasant feelings, allowing them does not mean you have to torture yourself, such as lingering on good memories, visiting familiar places, watching romantic movies, or drinking until you fall into unconsciousness.

Valentine’s Day can be an emotional roller coaster. There are many ups and downs of this lovely holiday, and it can differ from person to person, depending on what is happening in their lives. Your own feelings will depend on what situation or relationship you are in. Valentine’s Day will pass and come again to awaken the same feelings again and again. You do not want to ignore or push away your feelings because you probably derive something from them. If you are not careful, you may end up with a dose of disappointment and heartache. Whether you feel sad, angry, afraid, or self-defeated, you can benefit from individual counseling to help you figure out the root of your difficult feelings.


Loving and Taking Care of Yourself on Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day is the day designated for love. If you are in a relationship or single, you may put unnecessary pressure to do something extraordinary so someone special feels loved, cared for and appreciated. For some, the day is the most anxiety-provoking holiday that causes needless angst.

Valentine’s Day, however, is not reserved solely for those in a relationship, but also for platonic, non-romantic friendships. Numerous studies have proven that both relationships can be rewarding and beneficial for your emotional health. There is, however, another way to reframe how Valentine’s Day should be celebrated – as a special day for self-care.

The idea of taking care of others before taking care of oneself is so engrained, especially on Valentine’s Day. Focusing on the needs of your loved one and seeing him or her happy lets you forget about yourself. If you do not love and care for yourself, how can you give love, service and energy to the person you love? This highlights the importance of reminding yourself about practicing self-care.

Your emotional health has a lot to do with how you face Valentine’s Day. You may either feel sorry for yourself or focus on the positive things. It takes courage and strength to reverse your negative feelings. You may wish to stop time and hold on to that precious moment in the past. When you cannot hold on, you may be tempted to throw your hands up in surrender and feel all alone.

You are not alone. Isolation and loneliness do not have to be your companions for Valentine’s Day. At Carolina Counseling Services – North Fayetteville Office – Fayetteville, NC, there are independently contracted counselors who can help you. One of them may be the right fit professional who will work with you to heal those wounds and journey with you to process your Valentine’s-related emotions.

This Valentine’s Day discover what self-care means. This is the time to learn to care for your own self so you can give more love and care for others and thrive on healthy and enriching relationships. Start your meaningful journey by treating yourself this Valentine’s Day. Call now!

Serving Areas: Carolina Counseling Services

Counties: Cumberland, Bladen and Sampson Counties, NC
Areas: Fayetteville NC, Ft Bragg NC, Pope Field NC, Silver City NC, Linden NC, Bowmore NC, Autryville NC, Bunnlevel NC, Erwin NC, Dundarrach NC, Pineview NC, Rex NC, Lemon Springs NC, Johnsonville NC, Eastover NC, Stedman NC and Wade, NC
Zip Codes: 28311, 28395, 28390, 28356

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Carolina Counseling Services – North Fayetteville Office, Fayetteville, NC

422 McArthur Road, Suite 2
FayettevilleNC 28311

Choose your Therapist

  • Becky Clark, MSW, LCSW

    Specializes in: (Ages 18+) Anxiety, Depression, Individuals, Couples, Geriatrics, Criminal Justice, Stress Management, Loss and Grief related to death, disability, divorce, deployment, “empty nest”, retirement and other major life transitions
    Insurance: BCBS, Tricare, Medicare, and Cash

    Credit Cards: Visa, Mastercard, Discover and American Express

    Location: Fayetteville, NC